Monday, March 19, 2007

Because everything's better with butter.

Around dinner time, you’re pretty likely to hear this in our house: “Add more butter this time.” “Yeah! We’ll Julia Child it.” You know what makes cheapola Trader Joe’s macaroni and cheese really great? About four tablespoons of butter and the addition of the shredded cheese of your choice. Also, you can use half and half instead of milk. Just adding those simple things can make a huge difference.
Great new discoveries in the land of saturated fat have been made by us. For instance, did you know you can put vanilla ice cream, frozen berries, tequila and Malibu rum in the blender and have the best milkshake ever? Also, you can do amazing things in the area of tuna melts.
Oh, the desserts that have been passing through our house- Rice Krispy treats, cheesecake, fudge, ice cream, homemade cookies…The constant flow of sugar never stopped.
There were bags of Kettle Chips from Costco, consumed in front of a new Netflix, chased by M & Ms. Also- I have rediscovered the Cadbury Egg. Also, Cadbury Mini Eggs.
Some friends turned us on to a burger joint that can make any of their phenomenal burgers with a quite decent veggie burger instead. Our mutual favorite is one that involves tiny strings of deep fried onions, pepper jack cheese, jalapenos, some manner of pepper rub, and a really nice aioli. Their fries are also great. And they serve really nice blended drinks.
We feared nothing deep fried. Cheese was our friend. Butter, even closer to our hearts- more like a sibling.
And meanwhile, our pants continued to shrink.
Now, it is spring. The warmth is causing us to have to peel off layers. And we have found much pale flab, and also, that it is not the dryer’s fault. After weighing ourselves, just out of curiosity, Dan breathed a sight of relief. “Well, at least it’s not a problem with the dryer. I thought it was shrinking my pants.”
No, the dryer is only wrinkling his pants.
Thus the cutting back and avoiding all things deep fried begins. That’s right, we’re going to the light side. It’s better than buying new pants.

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